breast cancer awareness month // from a teenager

this is a very important topic to me, but before i get more into it i want to clarify one thing:

my goal is not to gain pity, or attention from this post. i want to share my experience with having a loved one who dealt with breast cancer and encourage more funding and awareness.

exactly one year ago, my mother passed away from breast cancer.

it wasn’t a matter of realizing she had it too late, in fact she had no family history of this. she was diagnosed not once, but twice. once in 2016, and the other in 2019.
2016 was stage 2 cancer, but thankful she was cured 2 years later.
in 2019 she had gotten it again, but this time it was stage 4 – the highest, meaning the cancer was spreading.

see cancer is a disease that takes and takes and takes. recognizing it early can help, and those who have, have a higher chance of surviving and it being cured, but unfortunately it isn’t guaranteed.
breast cancer is a common cancer and more than 240,000 people are diagnosed with it per year. anyone can get breast cancer.
of course, despite what you identify as if do you have them ( breasts ) screening is especially important, and even more as you grow older ( 20’s + ). my mother was diagnosed for the first time when she was in her late 30’s.
another thing to keep in mind, if you have a close relative with breast cancer, your risk increases.

if you feel the risks apply to you, please take the time to click on the links:
information on breast cancer screening
more information
spotting breast cancer

𝚕𝚘𝚠𝚎𝚛𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚛𝚒𝚜𝚔

this is especially important if you have a family history of breast cancer.

please note that this does not guarantee anything, if you feel that you are in the risk range please check this out.

[ these are tips on how to be a healthier in general ]

  • working out / exercising regularly – this falls into many categories, but that only says how important that is. if you’re ever looking for workouts sanne vander @youtube is a favorite of mine. she is so positive and motivational ❤
  • avoiding sugar – this is something i’ve been told as i have a high risk of breast cancer due to family history. again, this is a huge one in addition to eating healthy and avoiding processed foods
  • managing stress – although it was unsure of what caused my mother’s cancer, stress was a huge part of her life and without it, there could have been so many positive changes. there is a game called flow which you can play on crazy games lol it’s calming.

unfortunately, there are many things you can’t control like risk factors, however being healthy has so many benefits.

if you want more information, this article explains everything you need to know about breast cancer.

𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚗𝚐𝚎 𝚜𝚝𝚊𝚛𝚝𝚜 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑 𝚊𝚠𝚊𝚛𝚎𝚗𝚎𝚜𝚜

𝚋𝚞𝚝 𝚊𝚠𝚊𝚛𝚎𝚗𝚎𝚜𝚜 𝚒𝚜𝚗’𝚝 𝚎𝚗𝚘𝚞𝚐𝚑

those who have cancer have a greater risk of severe illness from covid, as immune systems are weakened through certain treatments.

in fact, research is at risk due to the current situation in the world.

please consider donating to one of the organizations below or clicking on the links:

Donate to American Institute for Cancer Research
Donate to American Cancer Society
Donate to the Breast Cancer Research Foundation
Donate to St. Jude – End childhood cancer
Breast Cancer Charities List
What You Can Donate to Help People With Cancer – Give more than money

𝚜𝚞𝚙𝚙𝚘𝚛𝚝

cancer is always scary. whether you know someone who has a loved one dealing with cancer, or who has it, please support them.

what someone identifies themselves as and the color of someone’s skin should not matter. remember, anyone can get breast cancer. because of these opinions, many are not getting the treatment and support they need.

be the spark in that person’s life. many people who have a loved one going through cancer hide their feelings, as they are scared to upset those around them, especially the one who has cancer. lend them a shoulder to cry on, words don’t need to be said all the time.

keep those who are going through cancer company. offer to help them out, spend time with them, drive them to appointments if you can. cancer leaves many drained, tired, and even in pain. they’re scared too.

be mindful that cancer patient’s immune systems are often weak from therapy. avoid being around them if you are sick as to not infect them. it is also recommended not to bring flowers or pets near the person.

here are some thoughtful gifts you can give to a cancer patients
more gift suggestions
supporting a friend who has cancer
when someone you know has cancer
a guide to supporting your friend when someone in their family has cancer

[ if you have more links on cancer / breast cancer, please leave them in the comments. i will add them ]

if you or someone you know is going through cancer please don’t hesitate to talk to me. i will support you, i understand. you can send me an email through my contact page. my email is sarafowall@gmail.com

and of course, continue to show support for other issues in the world as well:

support black trans lives

★ ★ ★

donate for free

★ ★ ★

please take the time to educate yourself on other issues around the world and see what you can do to help [ here ]

more of what’s happening in the world

my mom always wanted me to talk about cancer. so mom, this is for you ❤

➸ tag sunday ➸

i’ve forgotten how to write an intro.

( bear with me )

Pin on Animals
: ) hehe sorry


ughhh my formatting ;/




two weeks ago ( haha guilty for skipping yet another week ) – i did an award saturday aka all liebster awards and that took a lot of my brain cells.

BUT I’M BACK … with tags this time!

here are the tags i’ll be doing in order:
1. top ten favorite feelings tag ( my first ever tag! ) – btw i tag everyone for this
2. the talents tag
3. small joys tag #1
4. small joys tag #2

𝚝𝚘𝚙 𝚝𝚎𝚗 𝚏𝚊𝚟𝚘𝚛𝚒𝚝𝚎 𝚏𝚎𝚎𝚕𝚒𝚗𝚐𝚜 𝚝𝚊𝚐

thank you to hemalatha @frame of the soul for my first ever tag! it’s much appreciated ❤

( also i know you nominated me months ago, so sorry for the long wait

𝚛𝚞𝚕𝚎𝚜

list out ten of your favorite feelings – it’s honestly that simple!

➸ ➸ ➸

  • taking a warm shower ( especially after an exhausting day )
  • the cool grass under your feet ( also there’s something about it calming down your stress levels )

• 𝓯𝓪𝓵𝓵 𝓿𝓲𝓫𝓮𝓼

  • when your alarm rings but then you remember it’s saturday
  • finally finishing a presentation, a speech, a play
  • when the next season / movie / episode comes out!! ( MY WEBTOONS AND DRAMAS ehe )


  • nature has always given me a peace that my home environment never been able to
  • taking a walk by yourself ( just sorting through your thoughts )

  • listening to music ~ always
  • finishing working out

𝚒 𝚝𝚊𝚐…

since there is no given amount of people to tag, i tag anyone who wants to do this!

𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚝𝚊𝚕𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚜 𝚝𝚊𝚐

thank you srisha @sky and soil for the tag ~ lots of love ❤

𝚛𝚞𝚕𝚎𝚜

  1. thank the person who tagged you.
  2. mention the creator of the tag and provide a link to their blog. [ evin ]
  3. use the tag’s logo.
  4. answer the 7 questions you were asked.
  5. create 7 new questions or pass on the same questions
  6. tag 7 bloggers and notify them by commenting on their blog
  7. what’s your talent? it can be anything you’re good at.
  8. add your favorite quote!
  9. finally… Just have fun with it!

alright!

  1. if you could change your blog name to something else what would it be?
    oh my goodness i’ve had so many thoughts about this! probably something like ‘saltwater taffies’ and in a cursive font like…

ooh well something like that!

2. what motivates you to work hard?
honestly i have no idea! maybe thinking about the positive impact of it! ( though it can be hard, i’m mostly a pessimist *sighs* )

3. what inspired you to start blogging?
basically i wanted to have an impact somewhere ( online ) and so…

4. what are your hobbies?
acting, binging netflix, tennis, writing, watercoloring, sometimes i read fanfiction, designing rooms ( like interior designing i suppose )

5. can you choose your fav food and if you can, then what is it?
aww man i don’t know.

6. what emoji do you constantly use?
according to my recent emojis it’s ” ❤ “

7. if you had Aladdin’s magic carpet where would you want it to take you?
LONDON 😮 ( i like to think i’d fit right in since herbal tea is mostly what i drink )

what my talent is
creativity!

my favorite quote
its always: ” sometimes the hardest people to love are the ones who need it the most”

𝚒 𝚝𝚊𝚐…

𝚚𝚞𝚎𝚜𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗𝚜

  1. a funny phrase you had as a child ( ex. archeology phase )
  2. who is an inspiration to you?
  3. what was your favorite childhood toy?
  4. which fictional character do you wish you could meet?
  5. song type(s) ? ( pop, rap, etc )
  6. favorite meme?
  7. ocean or forest?

𝚜𝚖𝚊𝚕𝚕 𝚓𝚘𝚢𝚜 𝚝𝚊𝚐 #𝟷 𝚊𝚗𝚍 #𝟸

thank you to eleanor @wishing upon a star for this tag ❤ you’re so sweet

and a thank you to azeezat @thoughts and reflections for this tag as well! ❤

𝚛𝚞𝚕𝚎𝚜

  1. thank the blogger who tagged you.
  2. list 15 of your small joys.
  3. tag 5 blogger friends who bring you joy. feel free to say why.

my small joys

  1. a smile 🙂
  2. a sweet comment on a blog post ❤
  3. realising that today in fact was not a bad day!
  4. finishing a book / webtoon
  5. inside jokes with my friends 🤣
  6. bullet journalling
  7. nature 🌱
  8. a warm cup of tea 🍵
  9. netflix 💻
  10. books and writing
  11. listening to music
  12. my hobbies
  13. watercoloring ( deserves it’s own spot haha )
  14. sunflowers 🌻
  15. kittens

𝚒 𝚝𝚊𝚐… ( #𝟷 𝚊𝚗𝚍 #𝟸 )

well that’s all!

let’s just pretend this is a smooth ending because i’m clueless

maybe next time i’ll have something.

haha

eee

please continue to show your support towards revolving issues all around the world. this is not a trend – thus support should always been shown despite whether society is posting about it.

support black trans lives

★ ★ ★

donate for free

★ ★ ★

donate to cancer – it needs more funding

★ ★ ★

please take the time to educate yourself on other issues around the world and see what you can do to help [ here ]

goodbye moi frens

award saturday aka all liebster awards

these awards have celebrated their 2 month anniversary on my to – do list and i sure am guilty of it

here i am ready to kick down that wall and in style *cue loud music over my teachers monotone voice* ( almost in style )

school can be draining, especially when you look at your grades, but as long as the teacher doesn’t call on me i should be fine. sometimes i turn my camera off and watch netflix but hey no one questions it because they all just assume im i n s e c u r e which is half the truth, the other part being that it’s a little too obvious that i’m not focusing when i laugh because who laughs in math??

just as im writing this my teacher announces the deadly words: pOp qUiZ
rip grade : (

what is my intro? maybe i’m trying to put off the actual post and add to the endless scrolling

yeah i don’t know
i blame online school for my rambling and 7 hour access to the internet so i can write this post

𝚠𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚠𝚎𝚛𝚎 𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚋𝚊𝚋𝚕𝚢 𝚑𝚎𝚛𝚎 𝚏𝚘𝚛

( not the random school vibes – we don’t need them here )

short summary: i’ve been nominated for 5 different libester awards, and i’m determined to get them all done so they don’t haunt me

✰ ✰ ✰

𝚛𝚞𝚕𝚎𝚜

  1. thank the blogger who nominated you and provide a link to their blog
  2. answer the 11 questions given to you
  3. nominate 11 other bloggers
  4. ask your nominees 11 questions
  5. notify your nominees once you have uploaded your post

𝟷

thank you to aanya @soaring firebolt for my first liebster award nomination! do check out her blog especially if you’re a potterhead!

1. do you like stories?
yes! i don’t read much these days ( yeah i said i would ) but it’s always a wonderful feeling to get into a beloved book or fanfic which helps me ignore that endgame is still canon 😦 i also love writing ( i’ve said this so many times but writing means a lot when it comes naturally )
 
2. which country do you belong to?
America

3. when is your birthday?
can’t say since this is personal info – but it hasn’t come up yet : )

4. suggest me a story theme.
lost. ( i’m here for the bittersweet stuff  : P )

5. what inspired you writing blogs?
a few of my in real life friends like ash @starlight strands and eleanor @wishing upon a star were on the internet as well as a lot of people in my friend group had instagram or tiktok yes really! or really a footprint online and i decided why not + so much overthinking

6. if you have a wish then what would it be?
everyone being happy ❤

7. describe yourself.
i really don’t know but … an ambivert / infp : )

8. what is your favorite place you want to visit again.
my room – i literally live there 

9. one weakness you want to overcome.
overthinking /  being insecure – it really does affect many aspects and accounts for missed opportunities *sighs*

10. what were your learnings during this corona pandemic?
working out is isn’t that bad ( when you do it on your own ) *i am not an alien i promise*

11. your favorite song / quote.
going with a song – i’m always switching. but the one that’s stuck around the longest for and i still love ( despite not listening to it a lot these days ) is If You Want Love – NF

ugh wordpress editor :((

𝚗𝚘𝚖𝚒𝚗𝚎𝚎𝚜

to those who i’ve nominated – sorry if you are a award free blog, i try to check but as you all know i miss things sometimes.

check out their blogs! ⬇️

➵ maeflower @musings of a maeflower
➵ ananya @the simple little things
➵ indie @indie’s essays
➵ joy @rabbithole comics
➵ jofina @meraK_Ibe with jophiel
➵ srisha @sky and soil
➵ abby @i’m storyteller
➵ el @elated books
➵ shanessa @my days in montana
➵ chloé @chloé lights
➵ mary @middle mary


𝚚𝚞𝚎𝚜𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗𝚜

because i am lazy and the idea of coming up with 55 question is intimidating i’ll be asking the same questions to all 55 nominees.
( scroll down to the end of this post for the questions hehe )

𝟸

thank you maame for nominating me ❤ you can find her @pan elixir – visit her blog!

  1. when and why did you start blogging?
    i had a response to a question similar to this so in summary: a lot of people had an online ‘footprint’ and i wanted to have one as well. i thought blogging would be a little something fun to do especially being so bored in quarantine. also – i started blogging towards the end of may 2020.
  2. whom do you like the most in this world?
    my invisible cat
  3. how do you motivate yourself during tough times?
    i listen to that one song i currently am obsessed with on repeat and take a nap which just helps me shut out the world for a bit and calm down.
  4. what is your favourite colour?
    cornflower blue
  5. what is your first ambition?
    to make a positive change 💛
  6. name any three friends in your life?
    everyone in this wonderful blogging community!
  7. what is your hobby?
    i love to watercolor – something about it is so calming
  8. which is your favorite quote?
    “sometimes the hardest people to love are the ones who need it the most”
  9. describe you in a word
    dreamer ~
  10. which is your favourite movie?
    oh no – cue marvel lecture.
    i’ll spare you all this time with a very short answer with zero explanation ( your welcome ) : Dr. Strange.
  11. – – – none – – –

𝚗𝚘𝚖𝚒𝚗𝚎𝚎𝚜

check out their blogs! ⬇️

➵ krisha @krisha’s cozy corner
➵ addie and neria @life in pajamas
➵ ju @the ju photography
@the brunette londoner
@being flawsome
➵ ayesha @mughal creations
@the girl online
@here for you
➵ amber @amber reads
➵ beesawlah @keeping up with AFFY
@aarzu

𝚚𝚞𝚎𝚜𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗𝚜

scroll down to the end of this post for questions!

𝟹

ahh shrisha thank you so much for the award girl! don’t baguette to follow her @sky and soil ( au revoir, je suis désolé! ) for tons of positivity ❤

  1. is there anything you would want to change about yourself?
    again – insecurities * sighs * and overthinking would be positive changes!
  2. what brightens up your day?
    someone smiling at you – it’s a small bit of acceptance that can mean everything
  3. coffee or tea?
    i drink herbal tea almost every day but i wouldn’t say no to a boba tea every now or then 😉
  4. do you have a fav my little pony character and if so, what is it?
    oh my goodness RARITY I LOVE HER SO MUCH

i wasn’t allowed to watch my little pony when i was little but i did anyways

5. do you have a huge, huge dream or a huge goal you wanna achieve?
i’ve always loved acting and it’s huge to imagine ever having that as a career – i mean i don’t even know if that’s something i’ll still want to do ( and be good at! ) in years, but i’m hoping whatever i end up doing its something i’m truly happy with. i can’t count how many things i resent doing now due to being forced to do it.

6. most used word?
no idea! in 4th grade it was ‘ obviously ‘

7. do you correct people when they make mistakes?
it really depends. it’s important to know when to leave it be and when it’s actually important to correct them!

8. have you ever started a rumor?
no – i’ve always disliked things like that and i could never shake off the feeling of doing something like that

9. what last made you laugh until you cried?
a car. my humor :((

10. what does your last received text message say?
” i know!! just like a punching bag 🥺💖”
uh ahaha

11. cutest thing anyone’s done for you?
make me tea at 2 am in the morning when i was coughing a lot so i would would let them sleep ❤

𝚗𝚘𝚖𝚒𝚗𝚎𝚎𝚜

check out their blogs! ⬇️

➵ ada @introvert next door
➵ raghavasree @desert flower
➵ evelyn @evelynreads
➵ kerys @the everlasting library
➵ olamide @mindpilot
@the girl with a pink backpack
➵ hannah @illustrated by hannah
➵ maria @beautifulpeopleinc.com
➵ chloe @chloe’s thoughts blog
➵ charlotte @beyoutifulinsideandout
➵ ariel @the book view

𝚚𝚞𝚎𝚜𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗𝚜

scroll all the way down for questions! ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️

𝟺

donut @tales of a poor girl – thank you for the nomination! do check her lovely blog out !

  1. your all-time favorite book/movie?
    going with book for this one so i’m not tempted to rant about the movie! i love the ascendance trilogy series ( yeah it’s not a book but books but the more the merrier )
  2. iced coffee or milk tea?
    iced coffee! milk tea just isn’t for me haha
  3. if you had the ability to turn back time, what time period would you return to? 
    a couple years ago…
  4. if you could swap lives with a celebrity for a day, who would it be?
    reggie:

Captain Marvel': 5 things you need to know about Goose the Cat

5. if this pandemic never existed, what would you be doing right now?
playing tennis and acting : P

6. if you could get rid of one vegetable or fruit in the entire world, what would it be and why?
broccolis are meanies

7. name one musical instrument you’ve always wanted to learn how to play.
the harp!

8. if you had the opportunity to make up a word and have it added to the dictionary, what would it be and what does it mean?
everyoneisbeautiful: the truth.

9. name 3 items from your wishlist.
i’m going to use ‘ i don’t know’ for this because i really don’t – my mind is blank ahh

10. if you could meet one famous person, dead or alive, who would it be and why?
emma watson! ever since i found about her ( i was like 8 ) i’ve always loved her and she’s just so inspirational.

11. your life goals. name at least two!
1. doing something i like doing for many years to come
2. being happy in general

𝚗𝚘𝚖𝚒𝚗𝚎𝚎𝚜

check out their blogs! ⬇️

@south of city
➵ jasmine @bookworm
@ink of the heart
@the dreamer
➵ kate @kate’s beautiful journey
➵ princess @the mindful modus
@a book. a thought
@violet belleza
@den of dreams
➵ hailey @sunshine and rain
➵ valerie @all aspects

𝚚𝚞𝚎𝚜𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗𝚜

you’ll have to scroll down!





( keep scrolling : P )



till the end…

𝟻

lastly, thank you to dr namrata @pen of hearts. thank you for this nomination – i really appreciate it! she has a wonderful blog so make sure to check it out!

  1. what is your best childhood memory?
    i’m not sure! i remember doing a fairy play when i was six though… and that was a lot of fun ( and probably cringy to watch, i literally invited my first grade teacher to it and she came )
  2. if you had a chance for a “do-over” in life, what would you do differently?
    spend more time with the people i love.
  3. how do you spend your free time?
    watercoloring! ( a huge change from always reading fanfics * sighs * )
  4. what do you feel most proud of?
    making some wonderful, and amazing friends ❤
  5. what is the skill you’d like to learn and why?
    i’d love to learn how to skateboard ( teenage movie flashbacks ) and not freak out!
  6. what is your strongest quality?
    hmm, honestly being crazy
  7. if you could only keep five possessions, what would they be?
    – my laptop – sorry phone.
    – my laptop charger
    – my watercolor palette ( it comes with a paintbrush 😉 )
    – watercolor papers
    – my bookshelf containing books ( it counts as one?? )
  8. what teacher in school made the most impact on you and why?
    my first grade teacher helped my get out of being so shy and talking a bit more during c i r c le t i m e!
  9. who do you most admire in your life?
    there’s honestly so many people who have been such an inspiration. it wouldn’t be fair to narrow it down to one!
  10. what’s the best comedy movie you have ever seen and why?
    three idiots. as an Indian it’s something you will definitely watch and oh my goodness it is absolutely beautiful. it made me laugh and cry at the same time!
  11. do you believe in luck?
    yup! but not everything has to do with it – it can be all you! ❤

𝚗𝚘𝚖𝚒𝚗𝚎𝚎𝚜

everyone is welcome ~ i want to leave the last one open so anyone who wants to do this can!

𝚚𝚞𝚎𝚜𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗𝚜

for those who have been tediously scrolling you have reached the place!

here the questions ( some are the same as those i’ve answered as i liked them ) everyone i’ve nominated and those who want to do this can answer:

1. if you could swap places with a celebrity for one day who would it be?
2. one positive thing about yourself?
3. candy or chocolate?
4. favorite art medium?
5. favorite place in nature?
6. what’s your favorite riddle?
7. what’s the most ironic thing you’ve seen happen?
8. cringy memory?
9. which two people would you like to see in a movie together? ( can be absolutely anybody )
10. have you ever pranked someone? if so – what did you do?
11. suggest a one word story theme.

if you made it here – congrats on scrolling 2000 miles a lot. i hope it was worth it!

this was definitely a huge post – it could give my harry potter rant post a run for its money!

next week i’ll be doing a tag sunday ( hopefully ) but as you know i’ll probably end up drifting towards netflix to ignore my 30 pages of homework.

i guess we’ll have to see!

please continue to show your support towards revolving issues all around the world. this is not a trend – thus support should always been shown despite whether society is posting about it.

support black trans lives

★ ★ ★

donate for free

★ ★ ★

donate to cancer – lifesaving research could be lost if funds aren’t met in time

★ ★ ★

please take the time to educate yourself on other issues around the world and see what you can do to help [ here ]

remember to always look for hope ❤



bitter misconceptions • a short story

Reality shattered as the waves cradled her. She lifted her hand up, those thin, long fingers grasping at nothing as she sunk for it was painless.

Numbness seeped through her, and she wished it would reach her heart as if it would smother all the emotions she absorbed from the outside world, but it never did. How cruel – she knew, a grievance she carried as she was coaxed into sleep.

She collided with the world but turned her head around, curiosity residing in the dark corners of her eyes, a little spark. What she saw made her chest tear with the tantalizing glimpse of something new. The light cast onto the flowers highlighted its brilliant hues, the sapphire water formed by a million tiny crystals. It would have blinded her if not the perfection this world illuminated, it wanted her to see it all. She was naive – drawn to the attractiveness of the world, the promise of it rang in her ears and for a second she pondered the risk. It was wishful thinking, but as the sand shifted to form a footstep it was forever written that she had fallen for it. 

Just another hoax.

She fell in love with it’s gentle interactions, it was seemingly different from the despondent world she had always known. The air moved around her, brushing against her skin like the touch of a butterfly which was comforting as if she was in control to move away if it ever stung.

She lifted her hand this time almost afraid of offering her touch up again but as she desperately grasped at it she felt the invisible string of hope that stitched the sky together.

She wanted to believe it so badly, pushing her mind to accept that she belonged. Her bones shivered with the pressure, heart sinking as that part of her who had grown up far too fast, comprehended the fact that this couldn’t be real. She ignored it – but it would tear her apart.

Just luck. That part of her dared to whisper.

No – she whispered back.

 

Oh but she grew tired of gazing at the stars. 

She had mesmerized the formation of those little specks. They no longer gave light to the world around her but were a reminder of the mundane world she was from. And it weighed her down. 

The weeks that followed brought an existential crisis. She stared at the sky for hours wondering what forged the string that held the plane together.

Death.

It reeked of it. The water was sharp like needles against her skin and she couldn’t – it wouldn’t let her run.

As her world slowly twisted into insanity.

Wreckage affront. Thread hung loose, the sky was ripped – the shell of a reality so desperately left and long ago too, filled the crevice.

She shrieked as the water grew hands, spiked with sharp nails – grimy, cold, they scratched her ankles, ascending against her chest. 

She cried like she never had before. 

Growing quiet as she shook with the visible tremor, a burden of long ago and now. The sand knew it too as it turned to rock. Never gone, the past would forever be a part of them. The girl paled, strands of shriveled hair fell across her face as she hung her head low as she had done years ago. She realized – a cruel fate that she had never truly left herself.

The world around her split, and she along with it. Out of panic, fear, she racked her surroundings screaming danger – turned to obsession as the days lay forgotten. Sobbing out of the horror of being alone. Again. 

She sought warmth but the air repelled, now brittle against her skin. Afraid – of her. 

She was left to search for invisible monsters.

Her everything continued to crumble. 

Water chilled, rocks forever lay unmoving. 

Flowers indistinguishable from rot.

And she found that part of her speaking – as the last piece fell:

❝ why do you check for the monsters,

when you’re the one who created this world ❞ 

✰ ✰ ✰

okkk that was a lot

this time i decided to combine 9 writing prompts ( august 22 – 30 ) into one piece as i found it tedious to write a piece for each and every word.

the words used:
sleep • collide • risk • bone •  death • chest • luck •  warm •  danger

it was going to be 1k words ( 680 + right now ) but i forgot how hard it is to write that much !

of course i had to tie it all up with a sad ending.

despite that i hope you enjoyed!

also i just wanted to quickly say i got inspiration from the quote:

We stopped looking for the monsters under our bed when we realize they’re inside of us.

Anonymous ( but believed to be from The Joker or Charles Darwin )

and Taylor swift’s wonderful song Hoax which i definitely listened to on repeat while writing this!

this story was meant to be pretty open. you’re free to interpret it as you want ( the girl lucid dreaming or actually being in that world of hers ).

also little shoutout to Eleanor @Wishing Upon a Star for giving amazing feedback and being so sweet ❤

anyways… i didn’t forget 𝚊𝚞𝚐𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝟹𝟷𝚜𝚝’𝚜 prompt which I got to choose myself since it wasn’t given with the rest:

𝗹𝗮𝘃𝗲𝗻𝗱𝗲𝗿

“ Lavender’s blue dilly dilly 

Lavender’s Green

When am I king dilly dilly

You shall be queen ” 

A low hum sounded through the air.

A figure traced the rail with his fingers. 

He sat. 

Nails scraped the pale ground. 

They bled. 

The hum continued. 

“ Lavender’s blue dilly dilly 

Lavender’s Green

When am I king dilly dilly

You shall be queen ”  

Again.

“ Lavender’s blue dilly dilly 

Lavender’s Green

When am I king dilly dilly

You shall be queen ” 

No.

“ Lavender’s blue dilly dilly

Lavender’s Green “

Lavenders are not blue.

Lavenders are not green.

Silly.

“ Lavender’s blue dilly dilly

Lavender’s Green ”

Stop.

Stupid world. 

Terrible world. 

Where flowers were only one color.

Gray.

Ugly.

A world of black and white.

Lost.

The scraping grew louder.

The figure’s head bent lower.

As the hum continued.

“ When am I king dilly dilly

You shall be queen ” 

Silence.

Kings?

Queens?

Gone.

A brutal past.

Now left with the toils of humanity.

A burden.

The figure stood up.

What madness.

Hope hung in the air.

Easily swept away. 

The figure grew smaller.

Footsteps faded.

The hum lingered.

“ Lavender’s blue dilly dilly 

Lavender’s Green

When am I king dilly dilly

You shall be queen ”

[ … ]

✰ ✰ ✰

this was something i had prewritten a while before august began and i look back at it and it’s so cringy ah??

THE MONTH IS FINALLY OVER. ( writing wise! )

it was definitely something new, despite not writing every single day ( haha ) it was still a lot of work especially with school starting 2 weeks in.

i don’t think i’ll do something like this again. i really appreciate writing when it comes naturally, that way it’s not forced and you can really do your best.

𝓶𝓲𝓷𝓭𝓼𝓮𝓽 𝓭𝓸𝓮𝓼 𝔀𝓸𝓷𝓭𝓮𝓻𝓼
ignore me : )

anyways thank you so much for sticking with me as i stumbled through a bunch ( srsly ) bittersweet material with a few bits of occasional light stuff.

please continue to support the black lives matter community. this is not trend. there is always a petition to sign and a way to show your support.

Major list for BLM protests, petitions, and resources to educate yourself

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Donate to colon cancer in honor of Chadwick Boseman – you were truly a hero, rest in power.

Donate for free – just 5 clicks a day

★ ★ ★

please take the time to educate yourself on other issues around the world and see what you can do to help [ here ]

lot’s of love ❤

short pieces ✰ week 3

in the past two weeks i’ve been dragging myself to complete the prompts, and i’ve got to admit… i didn’t enjoy it so much. there’s something about writing that when it comes to you naturally, it’s so seemingly beautiful.

i gotta say that the pieces explosion from week 1 and dice from week 2 came to me ‘naturally’ if having inspiration at 1 am counts then yes very natural.

so i’ve been thinking about what ‘writing form’ would be enjoyable to take on and since math hasn’t been exactly the nicest, i’ve been meaning to keep these pieces short. of course i could go for poetry

but i found
myself
just using
the formatting
and not really
writing
the poetry
just like
now
ehe

so what i’ve really written is just short pieces with messy formatting – but boy did i have the time of my life doing them because i’m lazy

also i guess i should mention that i went back to being kinda dark

Guilty Pleasures | Frost At Midnite
contemplating my decisions

don’t worry there’s a bit of fluff

: )

𝚊𝚞𝚐𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝟷𝟻𝚝𝚑

Lie

48 Best wilted flower images | Flowers, Flowers photography, Wilted

Learned not to 
mind the sting,
or the cuts
your voice inflicted
onto my skin.
Had to pretend 
that what you said 
didn’t bother me.
Didn’t matter. 
Because it wasn’t 
supposed to.
Who cared anyways?
But it was the same 
game.
Getting old.
And my mind dared 
to scream,
for every word you
said was just a
lie. 

✰ ✰ ✰

half a month down! * kinda * for ‘ lie ‘ the way i approached it is kinda cliche but i hope it was still ok!

𝚊𝚞𝚐𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝟷𝟼𝚝𝚑

𝗥𝗮𝗶𝗻.

Pin en Aesthetics

Sunshine onto my skin, and quiet peace rain had to offer were always my answers when asked what the best feelings in the world were. They found it to be an unusual combination; how could someone like opposites? But I knew they were different, and although that didn’t mean they were wrong – they just didn’t understand.

The rain was mysterious, and I strived to wonder if there was meaning behind it? It couldn’t just be a phenomenon or how my teacher called it, the water cycle. How plain – it didn’t deserve that. The quiet pitter patter against the window was comforting – it gave off a presence that other days lacked. Small house standing alone but when the rain came, each drop that dragged against the window was a reassurance.

I loved it for its perspective. Turning the skies dark and gray, it showed the world behind it’s mask. Behind what we were taught as kinds, innocence faded. I saw beauty in it, as the next day the flowers bloomed and trees stood up taller. Not everything was somber. I knew it now.

And as I would breath in the sweet smell of petrichor lifting with up, the rain falling down on me was no longer a burden but a gift.

✰ ✰ ✰

i’ve always loved the rain. it’s the a breath of fresh air the environment of my home can never really provide – and the sense of peace it give off is oddly calming.

𝚊𝚞𝚐𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝟷𝟽𝚝𝚑

𝒲𝒶𝓇.

This Sensor Lets Scientists See Neuron-Level Brain Activity in ...

Lights going off.
Pain,
Anger,
Revenge.
So many emotions
all at once.
And I finally
realized
that it wasn’t you,
it was me
I could feel
every bit 
of the hurt.
For it was
my mind
that was always
at war. 

✰ ✰ ✰

even the little things can spark this, or days of stress. and that’s alright… it’s just how we react.

𝚊𝚞𝚐𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝟷𝟾𝚝𝚑

𝑵𝒂𝒕𝒖𝒓𝒆

Flowers Aesthetic Pictures | Download Free Images on Unsplash

“ Don’t you see it?” she lifted her fingers to the sky, moving them like they were being surrounded by the wispy clouds.

“ No,” I sighed.

“ Hope,” her eyes lightened up, “ It’s pretty,”

I shook my head slightly. I couldn’t blame her really, it was in her nature. I wish I had that kind of beautiful thinking.  

✰ ✰ ✰

another word for beautiful thinking is eunoia which in a way means to have good intentions – this is a motivator, i even have a sticker of it on my laptop hehe ; )

i know i’ve talked about taking something ordinary and seeing something 𝓌𝑜𝓃𝒹𝑒𝓇𝒻𝓊𝓁 in it but this is just another example. the flower in the picture is surrounded by a gloomy background, it even seems to be shriveled but in a way it looks pretty if you have that kind of perspective.

wow that was kinda… mature???
goodness gracious what has happened

𝚊𝚞𝚐𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝟷𝟿𝚝𝚑

𝐃𝐢𝐬𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫

The waves consumed their things and snatched their seashells. They saw the ugly, cold, biting waters surround their feet and they ran. The way it stirred was unpleasant, they wished it would get away. They called it a disaster. 

The sand didn’t think so. It rushed out to meet the waves willingly, whispering reassurance. It couldn’t understand the people, for it was them who were the disasters, not being able to accept the sheer beauty of something so different.

✰ ✰ ✰

this reminds me of the quote

Even after all this time the Sun never says to the Earth, ‘ You owe me’

Hāfiz

today is the day i become responsible and knowledgeable nooo

𝚊𝚞𝚐𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝟸𝟶𝚝𝚑

Rescue

Red Balloon Stock Video Footage by Jason Jahnke | Filmsupply

She spent hours moving the pencil about the paper. Anything to get the perfect oval. She was determined to do it on her own, discarding the stencils and tracers. She was perfectly capable of her own rescue – she knew.

Hours turned into days, as the shape filled with shades of sharp red. Her hands shook as she filled in invisible details that even she couldn’t see.

The pen moved in a fluent motion as she drew a thin line. Heart beating as she stood back to admire it. Nothing looked more perfect than the sweet promise of a different future. 

Clutched the sketchbook to her chest, she stepped outside. She held the book up to the dismal sky, they always said it was unfathomable. But as she looked at it more, she saw the balloon jump from the paper. She reached for the string, saying nothing as the ground hung beneath her. 

✰ ✰ ✰

this was inspired off how when you use your imagination anything can be possible ~

* this is also inspired off stories that you might have read where a magical pen brings things to actual life, except here it’s purely her imagination!*

𝚊𝚞𝚐𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝟸𝟷𝚜𝚝

𝙸𝚗𝚔

spilled ink by AlwaysConfused89 on DeviantArt | A darker shade of ...

Funny how 

ink

can write

the one word

which could

lead to 

endless possibilities

if not spilt.

✰ ✰ ✰

ahh opportunity slips away yet again

ok so i tried to be poetic just ignore me

ok so i know i’ve said this before but i loved the idea of writing short pieces instead of lengthy ones ( looking at you weeks 1 and 2 ) and quite honestly i think i’ll rap up the month with a few more of these ( next week of course my brain needs a break please )!

also yeah the formatting for this was a bit weird but at least there’s no more tedious scrolling

ok

please continue to support the black lives matter community. this is not trend. it only takes a few seconds to sign, and a few minutes to docate / educate yourself but the difference it makes can’t be measured!

Major list for BLM protests, petitions, and resources to educate yourself

Major Docs List of BLM Resources

★ ★ ★

How you can help those in Lebanon

Donate for free

★ ★ ★

please take the time to educate yourself on other issues around the world and see what you can do to help.

List of issues in the world

Petitions on issues around the world ( don’t donate to change.org itself )

have a wonderful day and stay safe ❤

week 2 ✰ writing prompts ( light )

ahhh. last week i filled my soul with dark and bittersweet prompts. and gosh laugh at me all you want because yes this is a blog for positivity and yes i’m totally doing just that.

i don’t even have to say no for you to know i’m being sarcastic!

so these week i’ve decided to make my prompts light, happy, sweet, whatever.

hm – can i say i’m honestly terrible at these things? positivity is so hard

i’ve also added another poll at the end but this time it’s for feedback so i would appreciate it if you gave an answer!

𝚠𝚎𝚎𝚔 𝟸 𝚠𝚘𝚛𝚍𝚜

𝚛𝚞𝚕𝚎𝚜

i already broke some of them last week eh

✰ must be related to the topic * sighs *

✰ under 500 words – a short read

✰ can be inspired by characters!

✰ must be original – i check with plagiarism checker / quetext before putting work here

anyways, enjoy these reads before i end up writing something dark

𝚊𝚞𝚐𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝟽𝚝𝚑

10 Bird Flight Patterns to Know – Bird Protection Quebec ...

𝗳𝗹𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁

Perhaps the most beautiful sights of the park were not the trees, or the warm hues of leaves but what was in the sky. Amongst the clouds you could see a formation of black dots moving gracefully across. They put the clouds to shame; their movement was almost inspiring. The birds never failed to put an expression of awe on my face. I was sorry to see them go when it came time for winter. But knowing they would return for the summer put my mood up, even the slightest bit. I was excited, so much so that when the warmer time of the year came I would plan my schedule around the birds just to see them during my walks. 

This time of year, I was left with a hollow feeling, unsatisfied as winter drew nearer, but as I tilted my head up to the sky to say goodbye, silently – I felt at peace as the flight of birds glided across the sky, knowing the important thing to now do was wait.  

✰ ✰ ✰

yup i know

what did i write?!!!!

ahhh

𝚊𝚞𝚐𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝟿𝚝𝚑

Last" #nature #leaves #leaf #fall #autumn #seasons #outside ...

𝘢𝘶𝘵𝘶𝘮𝘯.

The leaves fell in spirals, fluttering in the air like ghosts as they descended to their resting spot. The colors on the trees were pretty to many, catching their eyes and light of cameras until they joined the browner, soggier ones on the brown. 

To some this was autumn. To other’s fall. But to me it was a disaster.

Each leaf that collected on the ground was just another memory. Moments my mother and I spent underneath the trees, marvelling at the colors like no one else would. We saw stories in the fallen leaves, read them like lives and now I saw my mother’s. Gone, just like that.

I trudged my boots through the soggy clutter of leaves, lip curling in disgust to see so many of them stuck to the bottom of my boots. I stomped on the ground a little harder than necessary, attempting to remove them only to fail. No doubt I wasn’t fond of autumn, but at this point in the season I was especially annoyed. I couldn’t go outside without soaking my boots and socks up and tracking mud all over my doorstep. Every tree had lost its leaves to the ground… except the one I was standing in front of now.

The first thing that came across my mind was that it was special. It couldn’t be – it just happened to have one lucky leaf. 

I reached my hand up to it, brushing my finger ever so slightly against the leaf. The wind shivered ever so slightly, the background noises ceased to nothing and I swore I could almost hear the whisper of ‘ hang in there’. 

The sound was stuck in my mind, playing over and over again – my chest tearing to the feeling of it sounding just so similar. 

Hang in there. 

My mother’s voice. 

I smiled faintly. Maybe this little leaf was a little something good that autumn had to offer.

✰ ✰ ✰

happy / hopeful ending

i say it counts as ‘not dark’ !

𝚊𝚞𝚐𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝟷𝟶𝚝𝚑

ᴅɪᴄᴇ

“ Max,” the little girl stood on her tiptoes and reached for his hand, attempting to grab his attention.

The older boy looked at her and smiled, kneeling down until he was her height, “ Hmm?” he asked.

She fidgeted a bit, her shy composure amusing him.

“ Can I” she tried, “ Can I have a toy?” her expression furrowed as if contemplating whether she should have asked that or not. 

Max’s gaze darted around the clearing noting the numerous stands at the amusement park, “ Sure Tamia. Which one?” he asked gently.

She excitedly pointed to the one tucked into the far corner, a small stand with a few toys piled up on the counter.

“ You want the minions?” he smiled as the girl nodded, “hm – ok, I’ll get you a minion,” the girl’s smile widened as she skipped along the boy, her eyes on the prize.

Max drummed his knuckles on the counter, “ how much?” he asked.

“ One dollar,” was the reply.

Max fished in his pocket for a while, then pulled out a folded one dollar bill, holding it out.

The man accepted it, “ Roll a six to win” he tossed Max a die. It’s shiny sides caught Tamia’s attention and she waited eagerly.

One. Two. Three seconds. The dice landed on the counter emitting a sharp sound which caused the little girl to jump. Six little black dots stared up at the sky. 

Max grabbed the die, holding it in a fist, then tossed it to the man with a wink.

“ Which one?” 

“ The minion one please,” he grinned.

The large toy was taken off the top of the pile and Tamia stood on her tiptoes to receive it, “ yay!” she held it close to her, “it’s so cute” she giggled.

“ Just got lucky,” he gazed down at her, laughing to see the girl so taken by the minion. As he led her away he turned his head back to mouth a quick ‘ thank you’ at the man.

Once they were out of earshot Tamia grabbed his arm forcing him to open his fist, revealing the loaded dice, “ Max! I know you cheated!”

“It’s only cheating if you get caught,” he knew very well that he had been, silently thanking the man at the stand once again for his kindness.

“ You’re weird,” she admitted,

“ Hmm maybe – but my weirdness did get you your minion so don’t tell your father,” 

✰ ✰ ✰

awwww

this is the fluffiest it will get im sorry

𝚊𝚞𝚐𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝟷𝟷𝚝𝚑

Another aesthetic vid made by me (song: bubble gum by clairo ...

ᵍᵘᵐ

Right before the test I popped the little pink piece into my mouth praying that it would get through what seemed like the hardest paper ever. 

There was a burst of sweetness – courtesy of bubblegum and couldn’t help but be reminded of memories the flavors brought.

Ice cream on a hot summer day. Dipping the spoon into the scoop, watching it make an indent as you ate. Feeling the refreshing cold, melt on your tongue. Delight-full.

Or perhaps the bite of peppermint gum. The deja – vu of walking home alone, shivering in your thin sweater as you stare at the forlorn skies, waiting for that warm cup of hot chocolate at home. A chill hung in the air.

Grape was a little different. The sweet ocean air, the crunch of sand under your feet, finding a seashell. Taking it home to add it in your jar filled with other found things on the beach. 

Mint. Walking through the forest, damp leaves sticking to the bottom of your shoes, moisture in your surroundings. Peace and solace.

And tropical. Sitting on your porch’s staring at the warm hue of ice tea, grass billowing gently as flowers basked under the sun.

I blew the gum into the bubble heart leaping to hear the sudden noise when it popped.

Surely enough there was a sigh from my teacher, “ Alyssa, what did I say about chewing gum in class?”

✰ ✰ ✰

ehhh

𝚊𝚞𝚐𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝟷𝟸𝚝𝚑

ArtStation - Dirty Alley, George Garton

𝗛𝗲𝗮𝗿𝘁

“ You have no heart,” she stared across the sidewalk at the man sitting on the ground, his grip around his cup for coins tight as if he was scared someone would take it away from him any second. 

“ Maybe, but at least I won’t grow hungry,” she let her gaze linger a little longer, filling her with disgust as she noticed the months of dirt on his clothes.

“ Go,” his eyes hardened. Realizing he was still holding the cup out as instinct for any person that walked by, he tucked it behind his thin jacket, “ I won’t even ask again, people like you think you’re too important to spare even a penny,”

“ I can’t change the fact that you don’t have a job. It’s on you!” she emphasized.

The man stared at the ground, slumping his shoulders, his thin frame was now more visible, “ Well…” 

She shook her head, turning away. She had better things to do then to listen to a beggar. And the way he had talked to her, made her clench her fists as she shook with the anger. She had no heart? She could feel the beat of it. He spoke nonsense, it was pathetic that she was letting it get to her. 

She swung the door of the small sandwich shop open, sighing impatiently, to see so many people standing in line. The beggar had taken her time and slowed her down. 

Two. Five. Eight minutes and she couldn’t take it any longer. 

She stepped forward, tapping the woman on the shoulder who was in front of her  “ Hey can I go forward? I’ve got work to do and this is taking too long,” she snapped, her anger from before boiling up.

 “ Um yeah…” she looked a little surprised, but quickly stepped to the side, trading places with her. 

She ordered her regular, and thankfully it came to her quickly after she had glared at them long enough. Nothing was ever enough however, when it came to her as she smashed the money onto the counter and left abruptly. She huffed in annoyance as the chimes sounded behind her after closing the door with force. 

She took the route to her work, glancing at her clock, heart leaping to see that she had only five minutes. Knowing she couldn’t risk the anger of her boss, after much thinking she decided on taking the shortcut through the allies. 

As she walked, kicking a stone around, she stopped, her grip on the sandwich bag loosening out of surprise to see a little girl round about the corner. 

Her heart broke to see her frail and staring at her with big bambi eyes. She didn’t think she could feel any worse until the girl spoke, “ Excuse me, do you have any money to spare?” 

“ I,” she fiddled around a bit not knowing how to let her down, “ I don’t think so…” 

The girl nodded and turned to leave and in the moment she didn’t know what came over her, “ But please,” she handed out the bag, hoping the girl wouldn’t shy away from the gesture, “ have it,” the girl took it, and she felt sick to see her almost lifting it like it was a heavy weight, due to how weak she was. 

The girl tilted her head back a little, almost in thanks and then took off, turning the corner at the right, disappearing from view. 

She pushed her hands into her pockets and continued the walk to work. Her stomach rumbled but that little warm feeling residing in her chest somehow made her not care.

Later that day as she walked home quickly, head spinning, her stomach felt like it was eating her from the inside. In her daze she passed the man from earlier, completely forgetting her encounter with him in the morning. However a little, “ thank you?” brought her memories back. She turned around to find the little girl, the empty sandwich bag and man next to her. 

Her heart leapt and she backed away a little, immediately becoming defensive, not wanting the man to say anything to her and spark an argument. 

“ Thank you for helping my little girl,” he said, his blue eyes which she now realized were actually quite pretty were filled with gratitude, “ I was wrong. Perhaps you do have a heart,”

She smiled at her acknowledgement, feeling it’s beat and something more – it’s warmth.

✰ ✰ ✰

even though this was a story i hope that there’s still meaning in this and how rather than receiving a material object from being kind, you recieve your own share of happiness – and it’s definitely worth it!

yes this was over 500 words yeah i broke the rules

i’m a bad kid : P

𝚊𝚞𝚐𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝟷𝟹𝚝𝚑

dried flowers | Tumblr | Old letters, Vintage lettering, Lettering

𝓚𝓲𝓼𝓼.

Hands traced the wooden desk

Drifted towards the small bottle of ink

Brushed against the feathered quill

Fingers sprawled against the cream paper

She slowly slid it towards her

Droplets of water already marking the parchment

Her hands shook so violently that is was a struggle to hold the quill

As she sought the right words

Dear Anton,

Tears fell faster now

I’m sorry

Memories filled her mind and she had to will herself to not let out a sob 

I must go

She recalled the times of racing horses, the dust kicking up behind them – vaporizing into the air

It’s for the best

Baking pies and climbing trees for apples

As friends we were going to part ways eventually

Laughter and promises seemed a lifetime ago

As lovers perhaps not

Orange and deep purples of sunsets lain upon rolling hills 

Goodbye 

Wanting to add something, anything more she pressed the tip of the quill to the paper

She tasted the salty tang of tears 

She released the feather from the parchment, biting her lip to see a botch of glistening ink staring back at her

Batting her eyelashes, desperately trying to stop the tears she moved towards an envelope, holding it limply.

She folded the letter carefully 

Pressing down on the creases with her nail

Then sliding it into the envelope

Eyes dull at she traced the proper address into the back of it

Flipping it over, she stared at the cream cut perfect edges 

Hands trembling the bought the envelope to her face

Her lips pressing against the tip of the ‘v’ 

She sealed it with a kiss. 

✰ ✰ ✰

mm well it’s not *dark* so it counts right

𝚊𝚞𝚐𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝟷𝟺𝚝𝚑

Bright Forest Wallpapers - Wallpaper Cave

Secret

Most days felt like ice cream slowly melting to the ground – quick. Others were more slow and agonizing – the day I would take the route from school towards the forest. Run through the leaves, the crinkled noises they made soothed my worries as I brushed my fingers against what leaves were left on the branches.

I would seek out the spot where tree branches had fallen and I had structured them into some sort of large teepee. I remembered the day I had first come here. I was mesmerised by the calm surroundings, the breath of fresh air home never provided. I had stayed here until it was completely dark, heart beating, I had fished out a flashlight and carefully found my way home. I was grateful no one had seen me sneak back, but they wouldn’t have cared anyways – which was why I found it so easy to slip away.

Today I was overwhelmed with a headache that had never left me after the argument I had with my mother in the morning. Rubbing my temples didn’t help soothe it even the slightest bit and so I decided on the forest as a retreat. But as I walked the careful silence was suddenly disturbed by sharp footsteps.

“Hey!” I could feel the presence of someone behind me and I turned around none too gently.

“ Twig where you going huh?” I sighed, heart beating loudly. Not him, not today.

“ Uh, home..” I sighed, fiddling around begging that he would go away.

“ Hah no,” he smiled menacingly, straightening up which made him look way taller, “You think I’m stupid huh?” he pushed me back a little, testing the waters, “ Weak,”

“ Stop,” I whispered, scared I would fall back.

“ Oh?” he shoved me to the ground and I landed with a thud, the burning feeling evident in my palms, “ Don’t lie,” 

I saw the orange of the jacket and tried not to let him scare me. A glare and he was gone. 

I shook my head, and when I was sure he was gone I checked my palms, wincing to see several thin streaks against both palms. Not that bad I supposed. 

Taking a deep breath in I continued the rest of the walk to the forest. It was daylight savings time and I smiled to know that I could spend a bit more time in the forest until it was completely dark.

I walked slowly through the leaves, listening to the crunch – it was like music to my ears. I ended up shedding my jacket and hung it on a tree, wiping the sweat from my brow as I searched for the large tepee. I was at the edge of the forest now, and could hear yelling coming from one of the houses – something that was usual. I paused to look through the branches at it, wondering what could be going on that there was always such noise. My curiosity got the best of me and as I walked closer, eventually leaving the forest behind, the noise stopped and I heard the sound of the door slamming closed. I turned around, my intention to leave – I didn’t want to be caught spying but a color, bright orange caught my eye and I couldn’t help but look back.

“ Hey,” the voice was quiet and I wouldn’t have known it belonged to my bully until I turned around.

“ Sorry…” I waited but nothing came out, “ Are you ok?” I found myself asking.

“ Hmm, yeah,” he sighed, “ No actually – not the best right now,”

“ Ok…” 

“ Arguing with my parents,”

“ I get it,” I didn’t think I’d ever have such a conversation with him.

“ Yeah,” he said heavily, his voice tainted and I was sure he was holding back tears.

“ Want to come with me?” I asked nervously, “ Uh, to the forest?”

He looked up from his slouch, “ Oh,” he tried, “ Sure,”

I waited for him to catch up to me, “ Ok but you can’t tell anyone…”

“ Hm?”

I patted his shoulder awkwardly, “ It’s our secret,”  

✰ ✰ ✰

also over 500 words oh noooo

heh heh heh

not the best!!

i hope you enjoyed as i tried this new style / type! it was a bit forced + late am i right but i hope in a way i was able to give something satisfactory!

✰ little note that the pictures used for the prompts are not mine. the one for the word ‘dice’ was edited on canva ( using 2 pictures ) by me but the pictures are still not mine. ✰

𝚕𝚒𝚝𝚝𝚕𝚎 𝚊𝚗𝚗𝚘𝚞𝚌𝚎𝚖𝚎𝚗𝚝

school has just started which means after this month of august i will be skipping a week / two per month ( randomly not scheduled! ) haha

math calls :/

quick little poll!

as usual never forget to show your support for the Black Lives Matter community no matter the case! it only takes a few seconds to sign, and a few minutes to docate / educate yourself but the difference it makes can’t be measured!

Major list for BLM protests, petitions, and resources to educate yourself

Major Docs List of BLM Resources

★ ★ ★

Petitions on issues around the world ( don’t donate to change.org itself )
if you have any other links for BLM + other major issues going around the world please comment them down below and i will add them!

alright! thank you so much for reading! the most important thing to remember isn’t your regular at taco bell ( ok it’s important but hear me out ) but that you are so, so amazing! yes you beautiful human OK?

one word writing prompts ✰ week 1

ok

i know i said i’m a writer in my bio ( more like wannabe one ) and i haven’t really been doing any ‘writing’

but the month of august won’t take a no and so i proceeded to find some prompts – specifically one word ones since those are the most open and fun for me : )

𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚖𝚙𝚝𝚜

this was something i just found off the internet ( props to the creator ❤ ) and i really liked the ideas:

day 31 wasn’t on the list and so i added in my own one ( hehe ): 𝚕𝚊𝚟𝚎𝚗𝚍𝚎𝚛

𝚛𝚞𝚕𝚎𝚜

10/10 chance i’m gonna break most of them but for the sake of doing them:

✰ must be related to the topic ( no duh?? haha! )

✰ under 500 words – a short read

✰ can be inspired by characters!

✰ must be original – i check with a plagiarism checker / quetext before putting my work here

𝚠𝚎𝚎𝚔 𝟷 𝚠𝚘𝚛𝚍𝚜

anyways – hope you enjoy as i try and develop a writing voice! stick to the end for a little poll 😉

𝚊𝚞𝚐𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝟷𝚜𝚝

[ explosion ]

A little girl of grey 

Her eyes once as large as pearls

Now dull.

Head once tilted up to admire the stars

Downcast.

Her walls kept up 

She vowed never to bring them down

For there was so much more to her

Then the ignorant grey

Colors.

Red was for her passion. 

Which she kept suppressed for so long

To be more than a shadow

To live

Orange was her battle

The war raging inside her

To find a balance

Or break it all

Yellow was a feeble thing

Happiness

Scattered across in tiny droplets.

Underestimated.

Green was her growth

A millimeter a month

Trampled upon easily

Blue was her grief

Her loss of the person who she was

A past she so desperately clung onto

Indigo was respect

Acknowledgement 

Understanding that maybe

It is what it is

And violet. 

So very rare. 

But when it came, you couldn’t deny

Hope.

Really just a girl.

Hiding her emotions

Feelings.

Behind her tall walls.

Casting them away

Ignorant as gray

She didn’t say a word

As the pounding got louder

Losing control

Her everything crumbling

Colors.

They came out.

In an explosion.

And it was beautiful.

✰ ✰ ✰

this was fun to write!

so many feels

kinda

𝚊𝚞𝚐𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝟸𝚗𝚍

𝐬𝐚𝐧𝐝.

When I turned eleven my grandmother gave me a necklace. 

Nothing of the pretty sort. Just a plain silver locket.

To someone it may not seem like anything but my grandmother never failed to remind me that it was indeed something and yes dear it is special.

There was one thing I did not need a reminder for. The day I had first received the locket it hung limply from my fingers as I stared at it wondering – why this? Why not the red pair of converse I had been wanting for ages?

I was unable to hide my disappointment which quickly ceased to nothing upon hearing what was next.

Oh dear. It may seem like a silly thing but I promise you it’s so much more. Sometimes we need a little something extra through rough and the tough and so this is yours. But I must warn you – do not open the locket until you’re ready for what is real. The magic inside is the truth. 

The words were enough to convince me that it really was something. It became a prized possession, something I swore was magical through and through.

Now I am seventeen.

But it feels like yesterday when my grandmother gave me the locket which I was proud to call my lucky charm.

Except it isn’t lucky – not anymore.

How could it be when I had to say goodbye to her?

Watch my grandmother slip away to the stars.

It seems like today is a day where everything was lost.

The necklace felt heavy – weighing me down.

And the grass under my feet felt like needles.

As I tilted my head up to marvel at the stars and try to spot that especially bright one, my hands found their way to the back of my neck. They undid the clasp of the locket which was now easy to do after many years of repeating the motion.

The feeling of it weighing me down had never left even as I held it in my left hand.

It no longer felt like a friend.

“ Why” I whispered, “ Why ”

I felt the pain of the past fights, the falls and crashes.

But most of all the grief of my grandmother’s loss.

“ Why after everything you’ve done for me is it that you couldn’t save my grandmother?”

Silent as expected.

I stopped even though my tears did not.

My grip on the locket loosened. 

I stared at it. The ugly gray thing. And I hated it but I knew:

The locket held no magic.

Through all the heartbreaks, it wasn’t a silly necklace that had gotten me through it all –

It was me.

I let out a sigh and stole a quick look at the stars.

I was ready.

I slid my nails into the crack of the locket and pried it open.

What fell from it was not pixie dust – I once believed.

I smiled.

Through the dark I could still see:

It was undeniably sand.

✰ ✰ ✰

this is actually one of the two happy and light pieces of this week – weird

i had no idea what to do for sand so that was the little thing i had at the back of my mind which turned out a bit confusing.

basically the locket was a symbol of her inner strength

blahblahblah

𝚊𝚞𝚐𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝟹𝚛𝚍

name

she was a girl of the sort that you only had to look at once to see her past laid out.

harsh, ripped away. abandoned. 

she rarely spoke to the others on the street, only made thoughtful expressions. her mind was programmed that way – almost forever silent.

if only you looked closer you would see her flinch ever so slightly when her so called her name was spoken, her lips trembled with the word ‘no’ although never said out loud.

it was a surprise when one day she snapped, hatred for her ‘name’, that disgusting reminder of the past. a bruise never faded. left to scar.

she remembered the way her father had said it when he was angry. It was all the time. and it was laced with disgust when her mother called her. 

she was so tired.

her friends were her shadows and when they left her it was the voices in her head that stayed.

little girl. programmed. the same actions. madness running through her veins. errors when that so-called name of her’s was said she would stop but only just for a second. 

she traced the same path. everyday dragging her worn shoes across the grimy sidewalk, not minding the scraping noise the action caused.

she stopped to squint at a boy, sitting on the ground looking at her thoughtfully, a weed with yellow petals clutched in his hand.

what he felt towards her was not pity, but hope.

he took in her quiet communication, not saying anything – his eyes reflecting a warm brown.

he had said to her as he held the weed out that he thought she looked like a Faren. had said nothing more when hand flitted out to take it ever so gently. the voices in her head just this once ceased.

she smiled faintly. she liked the name.

✰ ✰ ✰

yeah it’s weird

for name there were obviously many prompts that you could think of but i was aiming for something not so cliche and hopefully i was able to do that!

i realize now that most of the writing pieces i’ve done for these prompts – prewritten ones for other days as well are kind of… dark and bittersweet. heh

𝚊𝚞𝚐𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝟺𝚝𝚑

𝗣𝗵𝗼𝘁𝗼𝗴𝗿𝗮𝗽𝗵𝘀

A new day brought a new start.

They said that. 

But I put it to shame.

It never applied to me as I got up to the same feeling – emptiness. 

It wasn’t my fault I knew. How could it be when I didn’t even know… where to start?

How to change.

It was like that. Every. Single. Day.

But today, as I set to decluttering my room, dragging myself around – my heart leapt to see the small, purple object, hiding among the mess of paper in a box.

A polaroid camera. 

And just like that, I forgot. 

Pulled on a coat and tugged on some socks.

I ran out the door with my battered, gray shoes – the camera tightly clutched in my hand.

Stopped by the weeds, but when I clicked the button – the photograph seemed to turn them into flowers.

Dirty pond, now clear in my hand.

Prickly field – actually looking peaceful.

Torn shoes seemed wonderful.

An upside down frown turned beautiful.

✰ ✰ ✰

what did i write??

i wanted this to be different from the normal cliche idea of photographs bringing back memories – and hopefully by doing that it didn’t make it badly written

𝚊𝚞𝚐𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝚏𝚒𝚏𝚝𝚑

wouldn’t it be nice if it was about Elsa??

𝙸𝚌𝚎

Loneliness did things to you

He knew it no better

How it engulfed you

Made it your friend

As it brought chills to your bones

Turning your heart to ice

Biting cold

The presence of warmth did nothing to help

Or the soft flicker of a light

One puzzle piece missing

No one knew it better

As the ice trickled through his veins

Quickly

But painfully slow

✰ ✰ ✰

why so COLD

eyyyyy

𝚊𝚞𝚐𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝟼𝚝𝚑

one of those ‘ five times this happened and one time it didn’t ‘

: )

Shatter 

[ five times she shattered – and one time she didn’t ]

First was simple heartbreak.

The pain of being left to wonder – whatever was wrong with her?

Crushed so hard.

She shattered.

She fought the second time.

As sobs threatened to break out of her.

But it was her mistake.

She shouldn’t have kept them in for so long.

The third one she knew was coming.

Hearing the words she was no stranger to.

Yet it hit differently.

Every. 

Single. 

Time.

Number four.

A day where nothing seemed right.

One more imperfection. 

And she broke.

Five. 

She let it happen.

She felt the shards of reality hit her.

Sharp.

Tired.

Peaced together by tape and glue.

She felt almost comforted by the feeling.

To the point where it no longer hurt.

✰ ✰ ✰

ewww

𝚊𝚞𝚐𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝟽𝚝𝚑

[ ᑭᒪᗩᔕTIᑕ ] ᔕTᗩᖇᔕ

It had been years before I moved.

Years since the little star had sat in the clustered drawer of my desk.

And years… since I had the unexplainable feeling of missing something, someone.

  Frowning, I pulled open the drawer of my desk, rummaging through the papers – heart sinking as I lifted up each one only to see nothing but another paper underneath it until I got to the end, thus the bottom of the drawer.

I recalled the day of goodbyes. Forcing myself to turn around and walk away, only for my friend to have grabbed my hand and shoved a little object into my hand.

I had stared at it, smiling widely and promised to keep it. For the little glow in the dark stars were the ones that lit up our tree house, giving room to imagination in the usual dark. 

And now I had just lost it just like that. 

It wasn’t right.

I ran down the stairs to find my mother on her laptop, browsing the internet as usual for another fancy addition to our already overly full home.

I asked her to put in my request, something I didn’t ask of too often as she nodded her agreement.

I had forgotten about it until two weeks later.

The tiny little package sat on the stand next to my bed.

Heart racing with excitement as I carefully opened it.

Days later my ceiling was full of plastic stars.

And I laughed as I recalled the memories.

✰ ✰ ✰

savor the fact that this was not dark

yay

also i cheated on the title 😛

did i do the last three all in one day? maybe… you’ll never know

hopefully these made sense and were enjoyable. my writing style seems to be a mix between short / meaningful?? sentences + bittersweet and light.

i dunno

and of course there is always room for improvement ( this is just the start! ) so if you have any feedback – do tell!

i would really love if you could complete a quick poll on which piece was your favorite! :

as usual never forget to show your support for the Black Lives Matter community no matter the case!

Major list for BLM protests, petitions, and resources to educate yourself

Major Docs List of BLM Resources

★ ★ ★

Petitions on issues around the world ( don’t donate to change.org itself )
if you have any other links for BLM + other major issues going around the world please comment them down below and i will add them!

remember that you’re an amazing person – YES YOU! never forget that ❤

reacting to my old diaries

yeah so i was that certain fourth grader who had like 20 notebooks and glitter pens and boy have i come a long way…

and unfortunately for me – but really * wonderful * for you guys i have more than one to show off

* s i g h s *

you will need to dig me out the pit of embarrassment after this one

𝓁𝑒𝓉’𝓈 𝒷𝑒𝑔𝒾𝓃

𝚛𝚊𝚗𝚍𝚘𝚖 𝚜𝚙𝚊𝚛𝚔𝚕𝚢 𝚌𝚊𝚝 𝚗𝚘𝚝𝚎𝚋𝚘𝚘𝚔

in my defense i was ten

BIG WHOOP??? why did i write that??

HAHAHAHA. i’m so embarrassed

𝚗𝚊𝚝𝚞𝚛𝚎 𝚓𝚘𝚞𝚛𝚗𝚊𝚕

pages for “science camp” in 5th grade

lets just have a moment to ✧ take a deep breath in and deep breath out ✧ and look at my HANDWRITING.

anyways – little backstory: in fifth grade we stayed at a place for a couple of nights ( science camp ). we had nature names and of course i just had to choose ‘cat’ – so original. other people such as leaders / instructors and my classmates had nature names as well thus the names butterfly and ringtail.

🌷 nature scientist in the making 🌷 nope.

yes of course no wonder there were trEEs in science camp ms. obvious

that duck looks so offended im so sorry please forgive me 😦

ok from what i remember we got to follow a path ” by ourselves ” ( so brave ) and there were little activity cards along the path.

i ended up licking a t r e e

-_-

are those trees i see?

wow i became part of the moss club because i licked a tree what an accomplishment

➷ ➷ ➷ ➷ ➷

thankfully that’s all of my nature journal for science camp. i would go hide now but i have MORE

𝚏𝚛𝚒𝚎𝚗𝚍𝚜𝚑𝚒𝚙 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐𝚢

4th grade = hyper 24/7 me ( stunningly weird )

FASHION. why is there an egg sticker??

diary entry on right side since words are kinda tiny

SHHHH IT’S A SECRET

” it was the middle of the year and we still had a lot of stuff to share about each other. but there are a lot of people that like to listen to our conversations so we needed a secret sport to talk about these conversations. what spot should we talk at? soon we found the hedge and we made that our… secret spot… and we would talk there about things nobody else was supposed to listen

…. SECRET….”

translation on right

” do you remember that we were girl scouts in 3rd grade? we would love to go to girl scouts because it was like a playdate… with you! so cringyy

“remember we once sold cookies together and you told me to shout louder? that was nice of you to not let me get embarrassed” well i’m embarrassed now WHERE ARE YOU

” nobody likes that! thank you “

honestly this was the only other diary entry ( from my side ) in this shared journal with my friend. if you’re wondering just how crazy i was this should give you an idea

[ beware ]

???

𝚙𝚊𝚜𝚜𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚗𝚘𝚝𝚎𝚜 𝚍𝚞𝚛𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚛𝚎𝚌𝚎𝚜𝚜

ahh the good times when 15 minute breaks still existed

3rd grade:

in 3rd grade i was OBSESSED ( look how far i’ve come ) with tetherball. not so many good memories since i ‘smashed’ my nose twice with the ball but fun yay

apparently in these notes my friend had a few guinea pigs ( i couldn’t spell it correctly at the time and still can’t but i have autocorrect on my side haha ). it was a kinda just drama where nugget ( guinea pig ) loved another guinea pig called pogo but pogo hated him. 5/5 stars

” WHAT WERE YOU DOING “ sincerely my friend

” when you gave me a mood necklace friend 1, friend 2, friend 3 got jealous! they were angry at you and me” boohoo 😦

so i am making a bff necklace for them and me. i am hoping they will become my friends again”

” now i’m jealous” sincerely same friend

haha third grade me. very baby. i don’t know if that made any sense at all but in conclusion: > DRAMA <

➷ ➷ ➷ ➷ ➷

random blurb in the same diary from 3rd grade. i’m not even gonna say anything… ahh

“PS MY NAME IS TIGERGIRL NOT TIGERLOVE THAT IS MEAN” – part that got cut off

no words

𝟸𝚗𝚍 𝚐𝚛𝚊𝚍𝚎 𝚊𝚔𝚊 𝚒 𝚏𝚘𝚛𝚌𝚎𝚍 𝚖𝚢 𝚏𝚛𝚒𝚎𝚗𝚍 𝚝𝚘 𝚠𝚛𝚒𝚝𝚎 𝚜𝚘𝚖𝚎 𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚛𝚒𝚎𝚜

yes i did. i made her write one about me and one about her family :

*sobs* so sweet.

on the right side was an entry where she talked about DIFT which stood for: dinner in front of tv, and 2nd grade me was so annoying that i corrected it from ” DIFT ” to ” DIFOT ” i still hold that grudge. ( jk im sorry )

I WAS SO WISE OMG.

yeah no.

𝚒 𝚑𝚘𝚙𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚕𝚊𝚞𝚐𝚑𝚎𝚍 𝚊𝚝 𝚖𝚎

seriously – don’t let my sacrifice be in vain

OK

: ) ehe

as usual never forget to show your support for the Black Lives Matter community no matter the case!

List of Petitions

Support Black Owned Businesses

Major list for BLM protests, petitions, and resources to educate yourself

★ ★ ★

Petitions on issues around the world ( don’t donate to change.org itself )

if you have any other links for BLM + other major issues going around the world please comment them down below and i will add them!

and of course never forget that you are a beautiful person and you are worth it ❤

watercolor messages and more

( i’ll try not to make this intro 5 minutes long )

if you’ve seen my bullet journal you already know i have no art skills??? so let’s just ignore all the pics here haha

but on a positive note…

i did try to come up with some decent pieces so bear with me please

i realize i haven’t done a giving post in a while and have been focusing more on lifestyle – so i thought i would do something different this time. these days when i’m bored i drift towards my watercolor palette – a leftover from my crafting obsession in fourth grade ( oh my god seriously ). i have so many unfinished projects concerning watercolor ( a good thing since i get so bored ) including a huge sketchbook ( mind you 140 pages hehe ) for art.

i honestly think i’ve been watercoloring more than fangirling ( really? ) …

✧ i’m a changed person ✧

anyways – i thought it would be fun to try an incorporate watercolor into positive notes because let’s be honest – we all need a bit of positivity.

which means i am not going to trash my attempts at watercoloring positivity but accept it ( ew )

𝚒𝚗𝚏𝚘

positive notes ~ cards for people, little messages to hang in your room and around your home, some messages for all to see, ect.

making people smile is a wonderful thing – and let’s be honest ( again ) we can’t help but smile back! leaving little notes, even around the neighborhood is an efficient way to get the message out. even leaving notes in your room to motivate and encourage yourself is even more important ( self love! )

𝚠𝚊𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚌𝚘𝚕𝚘𝚛 𝚎𝚡𝚊𝚖𝚙𝚕𝚎𝚜

basically what i’ve done using watercolor :

some easy watercolor bookmarks – with a message on them. the ombre was a bit hard to make since that is the one thing i struggle at with watercolor. i don’t normally do calligraphy ( since oh my god you can see how terrible i am at it ).

i’ve gotten into reading books again ( kinda ) and it’s nice to see a little motivating bookmark whenever i’m ready to read! ☺️

( and i finally got the book To Kill a Mockingbird )

ok… it did fail it’s decent and if you squint it looks like a wave – but as long as it gets the point across, yay! ( *sigh* positivity )

honestly just more watercolor – i really wanted to incorporate chopped up letters somewhere in here and finally i did. i used some tissue paper to make it ‘aesthetic’ but that failed as usual … didn’t work out!

AHAHAHA this is honestly crazy… i saw the kindle app logo and had to use it and it definitely looks far off from that. my version was longer up but i ended up trimming it as i seriously messed up ( again ahh )

𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚛𝚎’𝚜 𝚗𝚘𝚝 𝚜𝚘 𝚖𝚊𝚗𝚢 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚠𝚊𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚌𝚘𝚕𝚘𝚛

i kid you not that wave one took forever despite the quality

watercolor notes are perfect to hang around you home or even on a mailbox for people walking by!

but for a change i’ve tried to do the same thing without watercolor :

𝓭𝓲𝔂 𝓼𝓽𝓲𝓬𝓴𝓮𝓻𝓼

honestly. what a jem

( not my video ) all credits go to the yt channel Emberlynn Jimenez

there was a day where i pulled out my clear tape and got to work. and lemme tell you i was loving it! ( the results, eh not so much )

the first sticker kept on screaming at me so i had to do it at an angle so it wouldn’t shine so brightly ( drama queen * rolls eyes * ) – you won’t believe how many more i planned to make but dropped the idea when i saw just how good i was at making them -_-

notes – the first one is just a quick little sketch – which honestly turned out better than i thought ( i have learned to have low expectations haha ). the second one kind of looks disgusting due to the artificial leaves * don’t look at it but it’s probably too late now *

and honestly if you’re not feeling like being fancy just scribble a little something on a sticky note!

photo with my little cactus tiki who i have to water soon


ROCKS – if you don’t want to hang a note outside on your mailbox or front door or on a tree, a simple rock with a little message like “smile” or “have a good day” is sure to bring smiles. and if your neighbors are like me ( observant much? ) – they’ll definitely notice it when they go on walks!

𝚠𝚊𝚢𝚜 𝚝𝚘 𝚐𝚘 𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚗 𝚏𝚞𝚛𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚛

  • leave notes in people’s mailboxes or infront of their house ( be the good type of creepy mhm )
  • mail the notes to a friend ( if possible )
  • make thank you cards for workers who are at the frontlines of this global pandemic and mail them out to them ( mail to hospitals, a person you know who is a worker, etc )
  • support those who are fighting against this pandemic
  • show your support for black lives by making signs and putting them outside your house

𝚒𝚗𝚜𝚙𝚒𝚛𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗

here are some pinterest boards to inspire you! :

* the moon and sun hands + the stickers were inspired by some images off pinterest *

𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚕𝚕𝚢 𝚚𝚞𝚒𝚌𝚔𝚕𝚢 𝚒 𝚓𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝚠𝚊𝚗𝚝 𝚝𝚘 𝚜𝚊𝚢 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚗𝚔 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚏𝚘𝚛…

GUYS I’M CRYING STOP MAKING ME CRY AHHHHHH THANK YOU SO MUCH?!!!!!!!!!! 🥺😭🥺🥺🥺❤️😭❤️❤️😭

you guys are so sweet just – i can’t even tell you how much one view means to me! i so grateful for all this support and motivation since it’s something i really struggle with having

i’m just saying i would give you all cookies if i could because honestly just e e e

GIVE YOURSELF A PAT ON YOUR BACK

𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝’𝚜 𝚊 𝚠𝚛𝚊𝚙

no matter how long, whatever the quality ( you can take my word honestly ) – it’s always worth bringing a smile to people’s faces especially your own. YES YOU – LOVE YOURSELF OR I WILL SCREAM MOTIVATION AT YOU UNTIL YOU UNDERSTAND

anyways : ) i hope you didn’t cringe too hard at the pictures of what i’ve done

this post was a bit different from my normal giving and lifestyle area but i hope it was still able to somewhat inspire you!

remember to always share your support for the Black Lives Matter community! if you have more links and resources please put them in the comments and i will add them here:

List of Petitions

List of BLM petitions on change.org

Support Black Owned Businesses

★ ★ ★

Actions you can take

Ways you can help

and of course ~ remember you are an amazing, wonderful person! I WILL PUNCH YOU WITH MY LOVE IF YOU DON’T

mid summer check in * kinda chaotic *

whoo 2020 needs to c h i l l out and it doesn’t help that its summer! the time for relaxing and sitting in front of the air conditioner for hours is here and i am 𝓵𝓲𝓿𝓲𝓷𝓰 for it – yes please.

i sit on my beanbag and realize that quite literally one month of my summer has decided to hop on a car and drive away at 200 miles per hour.

i only have one more month of summer left.

one more month

so for the first time i’ve actually thought about my summer and goodness gracious …

ᶜʰaoˢ

˚         ⊹           ·  *    ✧    ⋆    · * . · .          · ·       ..   

𝚠𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚒’𝚟𝚎 𝚋𝚎𝚎𝚗 𝚍𝚘𝚒𝚗𝚐

nothing. frankly this list should be quite short ( because i really have been doing almost nothing ) ~ moment of silence for a once again procrastinating ~

listening to a lot of music – on those rare occasions where my phone does not get taken away i jump at the chance to read some fanfiction listen to music. normally i use pandora since i prefer it over spotify but since wordpress only supports spotify:

usually i have about 15 – 16 songs on my playlist because i keep changing very often ( and some days i listen to one on repeat – it gets annoying ). however some songs on my playlist are explicit so i’ve removed them.

» [ hey let’s procrastinate ] «

8:47:46 ─────〇─ 10:14:02

⇄   ◃◃   ⅠⅠ   ▹▹   ↻

writing – it does sound weird when i say i’m trying to write a novel. im currently at 45k+ words which took so much time to write ( my longest stories used to be 5k words )! i usually publish chapters on quotev @starry dreamer: Where the Middlemist Red Blooms

its blurred ahhh no – i wasn’t thinking when i made the cover literally i put ‘StarryDreamer’ as the name what-

summary:

Shortly after the death of her father, a girl finds his favorite flowers, the rare Middlemist Red on his grave. She goes on a journey to learn who placed the flowers there, and more importantly what role they played in her father’s past.

➹ ➹ ➹

if you do read it ( which would be greatly appreciated! ) just ignore like the first 20 chapters ok – well maybe don’t but i promise you my writing improves – ᵍᵒᵒᵈⁿᵉˢˢ ᵍʳᵃᶜⁱᵒᵘˢ and i call myself a writer

remodeling my blog – for those who were here when my blog was called pasionspired ( ew – if you weren’t there lucky you ) you can see the difference ( honestly though ) :

monstrosity
not so monstrosityress

𝓲𝓶𝓹𝓻𝓸𝓿𝓮𝓶𝓮𝓷𝓽 !

yay! there was no way i would be able to fix my old blog theme so i decided to completely throw it away and start anew – and would ya look at that. kinda crazy that it took a week to finish everything ( even now im finding small mistakes that need to be fixed gah ), but it was worth it!

sleeping when i feel like it – it can’t be new to hear that yet another person ( can’t even act surprised lol ) has a messed up sleep schedule. н σ η є ѕ т ℓ у

Sleep Is for the weak - Patrick | Meme Generator
SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS SPONGEBOB SQAUREPANTS asjdnksjdjbalk im sorry

fangirling – WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME THIS IS THE ONLY PRODUCTIVE THING I’VE DONE MY WHOLE ENTIRE BREAK I

i kinda just smile at my phone really creepily don’t even

˜”°•.˜”°• 🅃🄷🄰🅃🅂 🄰🄻🄻 •°”˜.•°”˜

my formatting is all over the place :/ help

ok hey – yeah that list was short but i can get better ( right? ) !

𝚐𝚎𝚗𝚎𝚛𝚊𝚕 𝚐𝚘𝚊𝚕𝚜

honestly – it would be very boring to listen to be rant about how i’m not productive AT ALL ( we get it?? ). but i do want to focus on a few areas where i can improve and make the rest of my summer go somewhat smoothly. since this is ‘ in general ‘ anyone can do this! :

  • drink lots of water – so very important and so very missed. i can’t be the only one who decides ❝ oh i’m going to drink 8 glasses of water ❞ and then realize at 9 in the night: goodness gracious i forgot and then attempt to drink all 8 glasses of water in one sitting ( ok maybe this is just me but still! )
  • smile more – oh yes the hypocritical girl who tells people to smile but doesn’t ( just screaming hypocrite come on )
  • finish a project – anything: a novel, reading a book, or finishing up a drawing – it’s so satisfying to see it finally finished
  • bujo more – try or not trying to be aesthetic when bullet journalling, it’s a very helpful way to organize your summer ( what am i saying ) and plan ahead ew
  • just read ( not fanfiction ) – if you’re like me who reads an unhealthy amount of fanfiction it’s time to switch to books ( especially after reading so many amazing reviews throughout the blogging community! ) and explore different topics ( haha i wish )

yes there should be more on that list since the road to improvement can be long – but best to take small steps first!

𝚊𝚗𝚢𝚠𝚊𝚢𝚜

enough of lists and rambles.

𝚑𝚎𝚛𝚎 𝚊𝚛𝚎 𝚜𝚘𝚖𝚎 > 𝚙𝚘𝚜𝚒𝚝𝚒𝚟𝚎 < 𝚜𝚗𝚒𝚙𝚙𝚎𝚝𝚜 𝚘𝚏 𝚖𝚢 𝚜𝚞𝚖𝚖𝚎𝚛 𝚜𝚘 𝚏𝚊𝚛! :

books i’ve read

Spacia: Dawn and Dusk by Eleanor J and it’s sequel Spacia: The Fate of the Galaxies are must reads! Both are light books full of adventure and magic. Read from lulu ( im terrible at book reviews but what im trying to say is: GO READ IT NOWWW! )

Loki: Where Mischief Lies Book | Marvel | shopDisney

Finally something to do with marvel that isn’t fanfiction! I absolutely adored this book and it captures Loki’s character so well. you don’t need to be a marvel fan or have any knowledge of marvel movies to enjoy this read!

𝚕𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚕𝚢

i want to give a huge, giant, enormous, thank you to everyone for…

it blows my mind to see 50+ followers so quickly. honestly i thought i would never get this far! so thank you to everyone who supported my blog – even just a simple view. this motivates me to blog not only for the sake of blogging but because people will actually read ( and hopefully get something out of ) my posts!

ᗷOᗷ ( TᕼE ᗷᒪOG ) TᕼᗩᑎKᔕ YOᑌ 🎉 ❤

𝚠𝚎𝚕𝚕 𝚠𝚎𝚕𝚕 𝚠𝚎𝚕𝚕 𝚖𝚢 𝚏𝚛𝚎𝚗𝚜

ᴡʜᴇɴ ɪ ꜱᴀʏ ᴄʜᴀᴏᴛɪᴄ

i meant chaos

i hope you enjoy reading this excuse for a post because yes this was just rambles of my summer haha

please don’t forget to always share your support for the Black Lives Matter community! if you have more links and resources please put them in the comments and i will add them here:

Petitions List 1

Petitions List 2

Support Black Owned Businesses

★ ★ ★

More ways to support 1

More ways to support 2

Ways you can help

𝚊𝚕𝚛𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝!

please remember you are a beautiful, amazing person. i hope you have a lovely rest of your summer ❤